“As a five-year-old in Berlin in 1965, I didn’t know that funny women existed. It wasn’t until I got back to England that I realised women could be funny.”

— Jenny Eclair —

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“I have a very low level of recognition, which is fine by me.”

— Dylan Moran —

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“People don’t want to listen to a celebrity tweeting about their charities and shows. That’s why comedy writers do well – we put out little funny ideas.”

— Mindy Kaling —

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“Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt, not swallowed.”

— Josh Billings —

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“Life’s pretty funny when you’re objectively on the outside looking at it.”

— Philip Seymour Hoffman —

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“Every cloud has its silver lining but it is sometimes a little difficult to get it to the mint.”

— Don Marquis —

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“All people are born alike – except Republicans and Democrats.”

— Groucho Marx —

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“During the Great Depression, when people laughed their worries disappeared. Audiences loved these funny men. I decided to become one.”

— Jerry Stiller —

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“What’s another word for Thesaurus?”

— Steven Wright —

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